The Skinny Jeans Epidemic

It really wasn’t that bad in the beginning. I must say I was actually happy when mens jeans started running smaller. But really? The shit is starting to go to far.
You shouldn’t be looking like this at 40 years old. Hell not even at 30.
First off there are GROWN men in their 30’s wearing these tight tight tight tight pants. I understand we all want to capture our youth but seriously dude only thing ur catching in them pants is a male yeast infection. There is no way in hell you can tell me that you honestly feel like a man while wearing tights with pockets. How are you 40 looking like your 15 year old son? Its not cute or appropriate for any occasion. There is a man in my building that I’m convinced his balls are permenantly lodged in his ass because his jeans are so tight. It wouldnt bother me as much if he didnt look like he’s about 40. Here you are 40 in tights with a big ass pair of sneakers looking like a damn bobblehead. And you think this is hip? Is this what women are going for nowadays? I for one cant even see myself talking to a grown man in skinnies without laughing my ass off. Literally.

For the younger generation. You have surpassed skinny and gone into another realm that I can’t even fathom. The sad part is you still manage to sag these tight ass jeans to show your dirty underwear. Like I want to see last weeks shit stains going up your back. At least with baggy jeans dudes wore shirts long enough to cover the fact that their pants were sagging. But you guys have taken it to another level and wear these tiny t-shirts to match the tiny pants. Its like ballerina auditions gone wrong. You cant possibly be able to procreate in the future with all ur junk in this unnatural bind. If fitting in requires damaging your manhood then these are definitely the last days.

Whatever happened to wearing clothes that fit? If the ankle on your jeans is smaller than the top of your shoes then I think thats a problem that needs to be addressed. If you have to jump in order to get the pants on then you need to give them to charity. If you have to pop your thigh in the jeans by pulling them up from the belt loops, then you need to put them pants in the trash. If you have to peel them off instead of take them off then they definitely need to be burned. If from behind people might mistake you for a girl….then you need to get your shit together.

Men basically, looking like a chick on club night in your jeans isnt sexy, provocative, or enticing. It just makes me feel sad for your nuts.

What is this blogging thing?

My first blog.  After ranting with a friend of mine for months on end about the circumstance called life, she grew tired of me and told me to write it all down.  Sooooo here goes!

After reading a few blog sites, well one particularly interesting blog written by a prostitute, I decided that anyone can literally do this.  I mean it can’t possibly be that hard if a prostitute is giving insight into how she decided that prostitution was the right career path for her.  I mean I’ve had a lot of different types of jobs and career paths but never ever considered prostitution.  I actually clicked on the link wondering if there was some eminent danger that caused her to choose prostitution.  For instance she was homeless and had to feed her 6 starving kids and take care of her half dead mother.  Yes I understand that things get drastic.  But this girl said that she began her career path because she needed a car to get back and forth to school.  Then ended up dropping out of school to be a prostitute.  I mean I think she could have made more money and received less stranger fluid if she chose to be a stripper…but ok. Im not here to judge.

Anyway, that wasnt what this post was about.  To be honest I completely forgot my train of thought but thats what we have other posts for.  Anyway….lets all wish me luck!